A beginner's guide to choosing your first pleasure product
Start with sensation, not features. A calm walkthrough of what actually matters when you're buying for the first time.
Abigail Reyes
June 18, 2026 · 8 min read · Fact-checked
Start with the sensation you're curious about
It's tempting to start with a product category — a wand, a bullet, a ring — but the more useful question is what kind of sensation you're curious about. Broad and rumbly, or precise and buzzy? Steady pressure, or something that moves?
If you already know what you enjoy with your own hands, that's a good clue. If you don't, that's completely normal, and a versatile first product with adjustable intensity gives you room to find out.
Body-safe material comes before everything else
Non-porous materials — medical-grade silicone, ABS plastic, borosilicate glass, stainless steel — can be cleaned thoroughly and won't trap residue. Porous materials such as jelly, TPR and PVC blends can't be fully sanitised.
If a listing doesn't state a material, treat that as missing information rather than a detail you can assume.
Size is about comfort, not ambition
Smaller than you think is almost always the right call for a first purchase. Comfort is what makes something get used; an intimidating product tends to stay in the drawer.
Look for insertable length and maximum diameter rather than total length, which usually includes a handle or base.
Noise, waterproofing and charging
If discretion matters to you, look for products described as under roughly 50 dB, and remember that noise carries differently through walls than through the air.
A fully waterproof rating (IPX7) means submersible; 'splashproof' means rinse-safe only. Rechargeable products are generally quieter, stronger and cheaper to own over time.
Budget honestly
A well-made silicone product in the mid range will usually outlast three cheap ones and feel better throughout. That said, a modest first purchase you'll actually use beats an expensive one you're nervous about.
This article is educational and is not a substitute for individualised care from a qualified professional.
Sources
- Material safety terminology — Manufacturer material specifications
- IP rating definitions — IEC 60529 ingress protection standard
Reviewed for accuracy against manufacturer material specifications. Not medical advice.
- beginners
- buying guide
- body-safe